You are as child as you were 10 years ago. Do you remember what you used to say when you were hurt? You always said nothing is in your control. But inside you wished to control each movement of the Universe, you wished to stop the time on the best moment of your life. Wisely accepted the purpose of the Universe.
There is nothing has changed with you, you couldn’t change a little bit. It took ten years for you to finally open your heart just to close it again. I don’t know when you will stop taking yourself so seriously. Why do you have so many criteria to open your heart? Why don’t you have any criteria to close it off very quickly?
You don’t fear rejection, you mastered it a long ago. You have even mastered to hide yourself in shell. Your most favourite place is your bedroom, I have no idea how could anyone be so comfortable inside the house and opposite whenever outside. You love to hide but, from what? Would you ever come out of that shell?
I know you are an old soul. Objective world is not your thing to enjoy. You feel alien in this world and couldn’t learn a single social behaviour. You believe in many lives yet, you decided not to comeback again on this beautiful illusional Earth. You want to be an angel because all you have is to spread love care affection. Again you want to hide behind being an angel.
What would you do to pass this long life? I know you are wanderer and you believe time is an illusion but, still how are you going to live in this objective world? Are planning to go to a cave in Himalaya? I am sure you would be happiest to be alone in cold. You love to be in peace after all.
Your loving Soul..